The Pretty Pear

Really Big Love - The Daily Beast

More to Love is supposed to be positive. The marketing and commercials are full of “you go, girl” lingo, lots and lots of “real women have curves” platitudes (as if thin women somehow aren’t real). But this forced positivity feels awkward, another symptom of the tension this show embodies—and the tension found in most media portraying the fat set.

Is showing plus-size women in prime-time enough to promote understanding? Or do producers have a responsibility to follow through with the idea and create something that doesn’t fall back on cheap clichés?

via www.thedailybeast.com

A really great piece about More to Love from The Rotund. I chose not to watch the premier last night, mostly because I don't like these types of reality shows to begin with. I'm going to watch another episode or two of Drop Dead Diva before I share my opinion but I like it so far. I don't see myself giving More to Love any of my time, though.

Further reading:

• Critics Have Mixed Feelings About More To Love, Overweight Women from Jezebel
• Look at the fat girl from Salon
• Fatty TV: OMGWTFBBW! from Shapely Prose

Fashion Day on QVC!

I know, this is kind of dorky but I do love the QVC. Fashion Day kicks off tonight at 10 PM Eastern with Chloe Dao (y'know, from Project Runway) and runs until midnight tomorrow. You can see the schedule here.

Plus size glam on What Not to Wear

I'm watching What Not to Wear right now and the participant on this episode is a plus size woman whose wardrobe really needed some serious help. She visited the Monif C. boutique and only bought one dress. I'm not sure how she managed to only buy one! She then visited Lee Lee's Valise with Stacy and Clinton and bought a mound of goodies to go with the nine pairs of shoes she purchased on day one. I spotted this Kiyonna dress in red and it looks awesome on her!

I'm a little jealous.

TLC reruns new episodes of WNTW on the following Saturday morning if you want to catch it! If not, they'll rerun it a million more times. The participant's name is Kathy, from Norfolk.

Oprah is looking for Chicago fatties!

Are you plus size and proud?

Are you plus size and proud? Chicago only! Are you a woman comfortable with and proud of your plus size physique? Are you not afraid to show it off? Have you accepted and love your larger body type? If you live in the Chicago area, we would love to hear from you. The Oprah Winfrey Show is looking for larger women in the Chicago area who are proud of their plus size bodies and might be willing to model for us. Please only respond if you are willing to be on television.

It's always been a little dream of mine to meet Oprah. I've seriously spent time trying to think of ways to get on the show. I'm considering filling out the application for this but I'm such a fangirl that I'd probably faint or throw up or do something else horrible... on TV... in front of Oprah. Eek.

Update: Two minutes after posting this, I decided to fill out the app. I get all starry eyed over Oprah so I couldn't help myself. I know a few other ladies in Chicago who might want to fill out that app, too! ;)

Reactions to Queen Sized

There are already a couple of comments on my original post and I have to agree with what those readers have said. If you watched the movie, leave a comment with your thoughts! If you didn't see it, I'm sure they'll re-run it and it'll be on iTunes tomorrow. I did end up watching the movie so here are some of my thoughts.

I've never cried while eating ice cream. I don't think I've ever cried while eating, period. I get that Maggie was supposed to be an emotional eater and they had to belabor that because it's a movie but come on. Perpetuating fat stereotypes doesn't really help the cause here.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that most fat people deal with stress in the same way most thin people do. I don't shovel a pint of ice cream down my throat because someone was mean to me. I might cry to my teddy bear a little but I don't run to the fridge. She RAN all the way from school to hurl herself at the fridge. Fat girls don't run, Lifetime. Get your stereotypes straight.

Queen Sized on Lifetime

Following on the heels of How to Look Good Naked, the Lifetime movie Queen Sized premieres Saturday, January 12th. I know nothing about this movie other than that Nikki Blonsky stars in it (we love her) and what it says on the Lifetime website:

"Queen Sized" is the true story of an overweight teen who takes a stand against bullying when she's nominated for homecoming queen as a joke and decides to take a shot at the crown anyway.

Every Lifetime movie I've ever seen involves a teenage girl or young woman with an eating disorder of some sort, so this is a refreshing change of pace. I'm hoping it will be better than To Be Fat Like Me. I mean, at least they're using an actress who's actually fat, instead of stuffing a thin actress into a fat suit, right? Right??

I do wish Lifetime would make a choice, though. Are they trying to accept bodies of all sizes and portray them realistically and with compassion, or shame women into losing weight? I'm confused.

Either way, I don't see myself tuning in for this one. The plot sounds ok but Lifetime movies tend to be super sappy and I have zero patience for over the top sap. But if anyone watches it, leave a comment and let us know if it sucked!

Tune in to "How to Look Good Naked"

Lifetime's new show How to Look Good Naked premieres tomorrow night but I caught the first two episodes last week on Comcast's OnDemand thing. I thought it might be completely shallow but it's actually a really thoughtful, enlightening show. Carson Kressley is as cute and fun as ever and he does a fantastic job coaching participants and helping them feel great about their bodies.

The first episode features a plus size woman who wants to accept her body and overcome her insecurities, despite thinking she needs to lose 40 pounds. By the end of the episode, she's just glowing and WORKIN' IT. This isn't your typical "make you over by hiding your flaws" makeover show. Carson strips these women down to their panties and makes them see their REAL bodies and that's where the love and acceptance starts. Definitely worth tuning in for!

Tim Gunn Fan Club

Did you watch the premier of Tim Gunn's Guide to Style on Bravo last night? Honestly, the show itself isn't anything ground breaking. It's a fashion makeover show. What's so great about it is what Tim Gunn himself brings to the table. Who else can say "I'm feeling woeful" and not sound... well, weird?

What I admire about Tim Gunn, on this show and Project Runway, is his ability to offer critique and criticism without being judgmental. He makes it about the clothing and not the person. And he does it with grace and charm.

Being a member of the Tim Gunn Fan Club, I picked up his book soon after it came out. Again, it's not ground breaking material. But it's written from the Tim Gunn perspective, where there's grace and beauty but practicality as well. The whole point of the book is to choose a style that suits you so that shopping becomes less about defining yourself through clothes and more about finding pieces that reflect who you already are.

I've always been looking for a book, or a magazine, or a TV show to tell me "This is how you dress" and just be done with it. But the truth is that no one person can decide that for you. All we have are guides, like Tim Gunn, to offer tips and some logical advice. The rest is up to you.

I guess I'm cranky

This isn't related to anything I normally post here but I think you'll understand. I have to be honest - I'm in a bit of a slump. I was all excited for fall and sweaters and cozy yumminess but I kind of forgot how dreadful November in the Midwest can be. It gets dark at oh, 4:45 PM, it's just cold enough to make my apartment drafty, and I'm just feeling very blah. I have selective amnesia about these types of things but truthfully, this happens every year. I'm sure I'll perk back up between Thanksgiving and the new year, though.

Ok, now here's something that is kind of related to what this blog is supposed to be about.

I watch QVC almost every day. I don't buy much but it's oddly addictive. My favorite show host (I know, that's sad) is Lisa Robertson. She's incredibly funny, considering what she does, and I just really enjoy her. However, she is forever saying bad things about her own appearance and it drives me nuts. She's a teeny tiny size 8 and she always makes these negative comments about her size, her thighs, etc. And I'm thinking about the millions of other women who enjoy her and it's like SHUT UP!

She's in the perfect position to slip in body positive comments and she does, about other people, but she clearly has her own body issues. I understand that, especially because she works on television, but she's speaking directly to the average woman who is NOT a size 8.

She's like that friend you have who's a size -2 and is always saying how fat she is and when you give her a dirty look she says "Oh, but YOU'RE not fat!" And then you think about keying her car.

So Lisa, if you ever read this - I love you. I think you're smart and charming and the best host on QVC but cut it out with the negative self talk, you're driving me up a wall.

Ok, Mo'nique and I can be friends

I'm watching Mo'nique on Tyra Banks' new show, they're talking about body image and self esteem. This show is kind of weird because Tyra's all LOVE YOURSELF YOU'RE PERFECT and she's a giraffe but it's not bad. I'm kind of getting behind it! Anyway, my point was that Mo'nique's reasonging behind "Fat Chance" is admirable, even if the show itself was kind of... weird.

Also, I'm working on finding a way to order panties in bulk for our plus size sistahs affected by Hurricane Katrina. This has been a challenge so I might just end up ordering semi-bulk from Hanes Her Way or something. The relief effort is on-going, of course, but I'd like to get this show on the road. I'll have more details soon if you want to help!

What I think

The general consensus about "Fat Chance" seems to be something like "Well, it's nice to see real women on TV in an ultra glam situation but... it's still a beauty pageant."

This is exactly how I feel. I'm not sure if I, personally, could get up on stage like that so I do admire the contestants' bravery. However, I'm not sure if it's ever okay to get up on stage and be judged like that. Yes, it's true that they're "all winners" but they were still being judged formally and by everyone watching.

Maybe it did change the way that some people feel about fat women. But, in all honesty, do you think that people who hate fat women were watching? Anyone who is truly disgusted by fat people would flip to the station, say "oh my god ew!" and keep right on flipping.

But maybe that's not the point. Maybe the goal was to make the people who were watching feel a little better about themselves as "real people."

I guess every little bit helps so I'm not going to say "This was sexist and wrong and degrading!" because it really wasn't. It wasn't even a little embarrassing, which is what I was expecting.

So, "Fat Chance" gets an A for effort and execution. Society gets an "F" because we need stuff like fat girl beauty pageants to justify our existence.

Fat Chance.

Alright, it's time to discuss that "Fat Chance" show that aired on Oxygen over the weekend. Who saw it, what did you think? You know I have an opinion, I just need to sleep on it a bit more. I'll offer my two cents after I read what others have to say. Discuss.

It makes me sad.

Oprah and her show is a touchy subject for me. On one hand, I really respect and admire her. She has completely changed the face of daytime television. On the other, I'm not always excited about how she deals with weight issues. That's the one area where she doesn't seem very open-minded or accepting.

Anyway, there are a few shows coming up this week that I think sound interesting.

Monday: How Much Weight Has Kirstie Alley Lost?
"Her goal is to lose 70 pounds. The temptations, the highs, the lows. Kirstie reveals how much weight she has lost, how she's doing it, and an update on her love life! Then, this woman lost over 300 pounds…her dramatic transformation continues. Wait until you see what she has done now!"

I'd bet "what she has done now!" includes some form of cosmetic surgery, which one would surely need after dropping 300 pounds. And, I'm sorry, but I don't give a rat's ass about Kirstie Alley's love life. I just want to hear that she's okay with herself no matter how much she weighs. I'm not holding my breath, though.

Tuesday: Anti-Aging Breakthroughs
"It's Oprah's anti-aging brainstorm! Can her make-up artist take years off his looks? Stay tuned for the after! How he did it and how you can too. It's the newest age-defying breakthroughs! Plus, it's the secret straight from Europe. How do they stay younger and thinner than we do?"

More weight loss, more dieting, more beauty "secrets." I'm interested in those makeup tips, though.

Wednesday: When You're the Fat One in the Family
"This woman weighs 420 pounds, her twin sister weighs only 120 pounds. Humiliated because they are fat, dramatic confessions. Are you the fat one in the family?"

Actually, I'm not THEE fat one in my family. My dad's fat and I have fat aunts, uncles, and cousins. But, if this woman's twin is skinny and she's fat, then being fat is clearly not genetic and thus, her own damn fault. Why can't she be more like her sister? HUH?

Friday: Oprah's Bra and Swimsuit Intervention
"Oh my goodness! Oprah's bra is the wrong size and so is yours. It's our bra intervention! The What Not To Wear Girls are fixing flat, saggy, and busty befores. Plus, look 10 to 20 pounds lighter instantly with tips to dress thinner for summer. Change your bra, and change your life!"

Ok, I love What Not to Wear (both TLC and BBC, the girls from the BBC version are appearing on Oprah) and you know I advocate wearing the correct bra size. But, of five new shows this week, four deal with being fat or looking thinner (the Thursday show is about a two-headed baby... seriously).

I know this is the stuff that's to be expected from a show for woman. But where's the "I'm overweight and I don't really mind that much" show or the "Kirstie Alley got a life! How you can, too!" show? Oprah's always preaching about having a positive self-image but how can any of us like our bodies when so much airtime is dedicated to making us feel fat and gross?! Oprah has the power to teach woman that beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. Why isn't she stepping up?

Fat "Actress"

We don't get Showtime, so "Fat Actress" seemed like a myth to me. People talked about it but since I couldn't see it, I didn't believe it actually existed. But, I managed to catch the first episode on Comcast's OnDemand thing.

Oh, God. Why? WHY did I watch it?

I don't even know where to begin. I was just so asbolutely mortified by the entire show from beginning to end. I'm actually having trouble writing this post because I'm speechless.

Ok, first of all, the stereotypes. Ok YES, some black men like big, bootylicious white girls. Y'know, just like how some white guys like skinny girls with big tits. I'm sure the whole "date a black guy, black guys love fat girls!" thing was supposed to be some sort of comedic device but it failed to be... uh, funny.

Please don't think that I'm a prude with no sense of humor. That couldn't be less true. "Fat Actress" is so completely not funny that it ventures right into appalling. Sometimes making fun of stereotypes can be funny! Because stereotypes are sometimes true! But, really, it's just poorly executed, like the rest of the show.

What pisses me off the most is that Kirstie Alley had a chance to make a positive statement about size and just completely tossed that out the window. She's a miserable, self-hating, spoiled brat. She spends nearly the entire first episode in some sort of dressing gown, which does nothing but make her look sloppy. We see her shoving food down her face because she's depressed, whining to John Travolta (ahem, notice the belly on him?) because she can't get her own show, and generally doing whatever she can to perpetuate every negative stereotype that goes with being a fat woman.

In short, "Fat Actress" is awful. Maybe if Kirstie Alley had a shred of self-worth, it might've turned out to be an empowering, refreshing portrayal of a plus size woman. But TV doesn't want that. They want her miserable, self-loathing, and obnoxious.

What would happen if there was a show about a fat woman who didn't hate herself? Would the world come to an end if there were fat people on TV who weren't portrayed as pathetic, lazy, or just plain foolish? Would FAT become the new THIN?